Thursday, March 28, 2024

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 


FUNNY (GOOD) FRIDAY

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Hello Byters and readers.

Some Easter humour today, hopefully no one will be offended, there is nothing in the following that, I believe, is offensive.

Enjoy.


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SOME HUMOUR:
__________

Jesus was born on Christmas, died on Good Friday and rose on Easter.

What are the odds?!?!
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Some comments by people in response to the above on the website where it was posted:

You think that's something?
Lou Gehrig died of Lou Gehrig's disease.

Ok but who is buried in Grant's tomb?

I told my wife that I have the same birthday as Adolf Hitler.
She said, "It's crazy to think that such a loathsome figure, who ruined the lives of so many people, shares the same birthday as Adolf Hitler."

I often stop and wonder at Fate’s peculiar ways, how almost all our famous men were born on holidays.

Easter was cancelled today - cops finally found the body.
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I remember being a kid and my parents filling my head with nonsense, like Santa, the Easter bunny and the Tooth Fairy.

Well now that I’m older I don’t fall for that rubbish anymore, thank God.
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A rooster wakes up early Easter Sunday morning. He sticks his head out of the chicken coop, and sees all these multicoloured eggs all over the barnyard. He takes a look at the eggs, takes a look at the hens, takes another look at the eggs, takes one more look at the hens, he thinks about it for a minute, then he walks across the barnyard and kicks the shit out of the peacock.
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A man was the only Protestant in a large Catholic neighbourhood. Every Friday during Lent, while his neighbours were eating cold fish, he was in his backyard grilling a steak.

They couldn't stand the temptation. So, they decided to try to convert him to Catholicism. He finally agreed.

A priest came over, sprinkled water on his head, said “You were born a Baptist, you were raised a Baptist. Now you're a Catholic.”

The next year, on the first Friday of Lent they smelled the same smell.

They rushed to his house. He was in his backyard sprinkling water over his steak saying “You were born a cow, you were raised a cow, but now you're a fish.”
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Why don’t the circus lions eat the clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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Two cannibals are eating Amy Schumer

One says "Does this taste funny to you?"

The other responds "No".

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A teacher asks the Easter Sunday School "Why do we celebrate Easter?" Hands go up. "Emily!"

"Easter is when the three wise men came to give baby Jesus gifts" "No, Emily, that is Christmas."

"Who else knows? Bobby! " "Easter is when Jesus gave the loaves and fishes to feed the big crowd."

"No, that is a miracle Bobby." "Who can tell us why we celebrate Easter? Amanda!"

"Easter is the time of year when they put Jesus on a cross and he died and they put him in a tomb."

"Yes! Very good, Amanda!"

"And if Jesus comes out of his tomb and sees his shadow, then we will get six more weeks of winter!"

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LIMERICK OF THE WEEK:

When Dick met a young lady from Clare,
He was the first one to get there.
She said “Copulation
Can result in gestation,
But gosh, now you’re there, I don’t care.’

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GALLERY:







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CORN CORNER:
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What do you call it when a German supermarket is all out of sausage and cheese?

A Wurst Kรคse scenario!
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A mime in my town was arrested yesterday after he broke his left arm in a bar fight.

But he still has the right to remain silent.
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A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson in logic.

"Here is the situation," she said. "A man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?"

A girl raised her hand and asked "To draw out all his savings?"



Wednesday, March 27, 2024

QUOTE FOR THE DAY

 


JIM

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If you haven’t seen vehicles for various businesses with Jim’s face on them, you need to get out more. Starting off as Jim’s Mowing, Jim has diversified into other business fields, but still with his name and face prominently displayed.


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About Jim:

David "Jim" Penman (1952 - ) is an Australian businessman and historian in the field of biohistory. He is the owner of Jim's Group, a lawn care service franchise. He has self-published books, based partially on his work with a lab he funds at La Trobe University, to make claims on predicting human culture and history based on the activities of mice. His books have been described as eugenics, drawing on racial stereotypes. Penman described his ideas as being classified as conservative liberalism and neoliberalism.

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Further comments:

Penman commenced PhD degree studies at La Trobe University, under the supervision of June Philipp, who was part of a network of ethnographic historians called "the Melbourne Group"

His PhD thesis looked at character as a key to understanding history. Penman's thesis was initially rejected in 1981, although Penman's supervisor then suggested that he rewrite the methodology section of the thesis. Penman followed the suggestion, and the thesis was re-submitted in 1983 and subsequently accepted in April 1984.

After the completion of his PhD in 1983, Penman gradually turned his part-time lawn mowing business into a franchising business, focusing on setting up and selling lawn-mowing rounds and taking on sub-contractors.

After launching the franchise business in 1989, Penman expanded to include additional industries. The first addition was cleaning services, and by 2012 the franchise model had been adapted to over 30 service industries. 




As of 2023, Jim’s Group has over 5,200 franchisees in Australia, New Zealand, Canada, and the United Kingdom.









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Memes and Merchandise:

Various outlets sell t shirts, stick on labels and merchandise bearing Jim’s face as above, plus other businesses that are attributed to him –

an example:



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More:










































































Tuesday, March 26, 2024

QUOTE FOR THE DAY

 


POETRY SPOT: FIRE AND ICE

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Fire and Ice

By Robert Frost

Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I’ve tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.
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"Fire and Ice" is a short poem by Robert Frost that discusses the end of the world, likening the elemental force of fire with the emotion of desire, and ice with hate. It was first published in December 1920.

According to one of Frost's biographers, "Fire and Ice" was inspired by a passage in Canto 32 of Dante's Inferno, in which the worst offenders of hell (the traitors) are frozen in the ninth and lowest circle:
"a lake so bound with ice,
It did not look like water, but like a glass...right clear
I saw, where sinners are preserved in ice."

Illustration of 1587 by Stradanus of The Nine Circles of Hell from Dante's Inferno

In an anecdote he recounted in 1960 in a "Science and the Arts" presentation, the prominent astronomer Harlow Shapley claims to have inspired "Fire and Ice". Shapley describes an encounter he had with Frost a year before the poem was published in which Frost, noting that Shapley was the astronomer of his day, asked him how the world will end. Shapley responded that either the sun will explode and incinerate the Earth, or the Earth will somehow escape this fate only to end up slowly freezing in deep space. Shapley was surprised at seeing "Fire and Ice" in print a year later, and referred to it as an example of how science can influence the creation of art, or clarify its meaning.

In a 1999 article, John N. Serio claims that the poem is a compression of Dante's Inferno. He draws a parallel between the nine lines of the poem with the nine rings of Hell, and notes that, like the downward funnel of the rings of Hell, the poem narrows considerably in the last two lines.

John Serio asserts that Frost's diction further highlights the parallels between Frost's discussion of desire and hate with Dante's outlook on sins of passion and reason with sensuous and physical verbs describing desire and loosely recalling the characters Dante met in the upper rings of Hell: "taste" (recalling the Glutton), "hold" (recalling the adulterous lovers), and "favor" (recalling the hoarders). In contrast, hate is discussed with verbs of reason and thought ("I think I know.../To say...").

Serio praises the poem for its compactness, arguing that "Fire and Ice" signaled for Frost "a new style, tone, manner, [and] form" and that its casual tone masks the serious question it poses to the reader.

From

. . .fire and ice are perhaps more allegorical than symbolic in Frost’s poem, because rather than leaving these deeply symbolic forces of fire and ice open to speculation and different interpretations, he goes on to link them very specifically to two particular emotions: desire for fire, and hate for ice.

. . will humans destroy the world through hating each other so much that we all kill each other? Or will passionate desire actually destroy everything?

In other words, what begins in rather elemental, open-ended terms (perhaps even inviting us to think of global warming, something unknown to Frost, when we read of the world ending in fire) comes to have a distinctly human aspect, grounded in human emotions and behaviour.

What makes ‘Fire and Ice’ such a haunting and even troubling poem is its acknowledgment that desire and passion can be more deadly and destructive than mere hate: hate (‘ice’) may well consume us all through war (we need only look at how religious and political differences can make whole groups of people hate their neighbours), but desire (‘fire’) may prove even more powerful because it can provide the zeal, the irrational belief in something, that will fuel even more destructive behaviour.